Funny Plumbing Story


embarrassed plumberAlright, so here’s a funny plumbing story that I don’t think we’ve enough people yet. More than likely Jeff is going to kill me for telling this story. But whatever! I hope you enjoy it!

So about 6 months ago Jeff and I walk onto this job site (commercial property) to give a bid on plumbing work. The head honcho there was this guy named Evan who had some serious anger issues. Evan was the kind of boss who screamed at everyone no matter what they were doing. Anything you do around this guy is the wrong thing. We were walking along the job site with him, watching him critique everybody’s work, screaming at people, and he even started throwing screws at one guy who he caught chatting with another guy.

Needless to say I had no interest in working at this job site. I don’t care how much money you’re going to pay me, I can’t work for a guy like that. I’d never get anything done!

Well, Jeff felt different from the way that I did. He goes where there’s money and he’ll do anything to get it! So the whole time I’m laughing while Jeff is kissing Evan’s behind. All this “Yes sir” and “No sir” kind of talk. Honestly, the money we were looking at making was pretty good, but I figure we can make just as much taking on other jobs, so I decided to have a little fun.

After we spent some time talking plumbing, Evan invited us to lunch. He was placing an order over the phone for some delivery. Jeff was going to order for me, so he asked what I wanted. I told him to get me the Tube Steak. Evan asked “What do you guys want?” and Jeff replied “Get us some Tube Steak”. Evan gave us a funny look and it took every ounce of my being not to crack up. Jeff immediately turned ghostly white with fear. Evan places the order for “Tube Steak” and we could hear the guys on the other end of the phone cracking up.

Evan looked at Jeff and screamed “You some kind of comedian now!? What the f#ck is this sh$t!?”. I broke out into laughter as Jeff began to apologize. The guy asked me if this was my doing and I was totally happy to answer yes. I told him that I thought he was an a-hole and that there’s no way I’m going to work with a guy as stiff as he is.

To my surprise Evan started laughing! He walked over to me, put his hand on my shoulder and said “You know, most of these vaginas out here are scared sh*tless of me, just like your friend Jeff here. They’ve got no backbone, so I walk all over them. But you’re the type of guy I like to work with. That was a good joke”.

Jeff was and will forever be extremely embarrassed by this story. We ended up taking the job, took a couple of months to do the plumbing for this building, and Jeff was ridiculed the entire time. The nick named him “Big V” on the job site.

Let us know what you think of our funny stories and if you’d like to hear more of them. We’ve got a million of them! make sure to check in regularly for our latest blog posts!

Why you should Marry a Contractor


marry a contractorFor some people, the idea of a contractor is a neanderthal-like person who didn’t do well in school and drinks a lot of beer.

Although this is probably true, there’s a good few reasons why you should marry a contractor. It isn’t simply our damn good looks, these huge muscles, or the fact that we could eat more than most men. No, it isn’t just those facts. If you’re considering dating or marrying a contractor, here’s a few good reasons why you need to do it.

  1. Contractors are super handy – If you’ve ever had trouble with a leaky faucet, a fence that fell down, a window that won’t shut, a leaky refrigerator, or even car trouble, contractors are the best guys to be around! We fix all that crap for you. If you marry a banker, he’s probably going to worry about breaking a nail. If you marry a surgeon, he’s probably going to be in Bejing performing an autopsy for college kids (or whatever the hell surgeons do with all their time). The fact is, contractors are super handy to have around.
  2. Contractors are fun – Doctors, lawyers and bankers are pretty conservative groups of people. They definitely make money, but they’re not always the most fun in the world. If you want to get in a truck and hit the mud, get with a contractor. If you want to go out dancing and get into a bar fight, a contractor can probably arrange that for you. If you want someone who is going to say something stupid and make you laugh, that’s all we do!
  3. Contractors make money – Yes it’s true. Whether it’s a landscaper, a plumber or a roofer, contractors make good money. A plumbing job could be as much as $80,000 or even more! Roofers make an average of $7,000 per new roof. Landscapers can sometimes nail jobs as much as $40,000. It’s true that most business owners will make decent money in whatever business their successful in. However, if you’re married to a contractor, you’re probably going to be a business manager, you’ll pay yourself all the time (a lot more than any other manager would get paid) and you’ll get to be the boss! You’ll also probably get to make your own hours.
  4. We’re general kind and have big hearts – It’s true… We’re really just a bunch of teddy bears… That’s why most women love us. It isn’t the money or the muscle or even the fun times. At the end of the day I look at my wife like it was the first time I ever laid eyes on her. And after a full day of hammering and pounding and injuries and sweat and sore muscles, I look in her eyes and feel like it was all worth it.

So next time you ask yourself if you should date a contractor, keep in mind the above. We’re good guys. We’re great guys! We’ll treat you right and stick with you till the end.